I & I become We

Weathered hearts are all the same
Cautious as they see one kindred
Oft it happens they collide unknowing
At special times they fight to be

Debate the chance that you see I
As plentiful a heart as I see you
Restricted by the thoughts of words
Their meanings are misconstrued

These feelings do not need letters
Or paragraphs brimming with the like
But souls push bodies to vocalize
Despite the tarnished ones lurking in sight

Iubi, I know you’ve called for me
In thoughts which to you were plain
As fast as our love appears to grow
Hearts tampered-with detest pain

But at some point it becomes too much
To ignore the urge to speak in tongue
Right before hearts give up
Familiar souls will intervene

My I looks deep to the eyes of its old
Against the providence within
Fights back against the will of trepidation
To ignore otherwise is the highest degree of sin

Cut through the fog that masks this love
Just know our souls have been here before
It’s never easy for them to reunite
But years upon years they never flee

Us two have found their new beginning
Their love will never be stymied
Contentment creates their new bodies
As they’ve led I & I to become We

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Nestled

Spring together

Rich blood

The richness he felt was different than most

Riddled by thoughts of her soft hands

The downspout of love had been blocked

And yet here she was to instantly dislodge it

At first it started with a slow trickle

Easing out as the sludge was cleared

Soon enough it was clean and pure

Despite the darkness that he always feared

It was only her who could have done this

For she truly did understand it all

The years of stagnant growth he suffered

And her own time spent counting tears

Some would say it could have been anyone

But the two silently knew that was wrong

As the rich blood of life ran through them

They felt again that it was possible to belong

Just wait till that gutter runs fast and strong

Unable to stop the stream of delight

With one glance from her eyes down to hips

He knew he’d never give up the fight.

Variables

It’s not that he couldn’t do without her, it’s that the lack of her would be doing a disservice to the entire idea of what it is to be human; to respect and identify with another person completely in this world that most often omits any semblance of sense, and to give yourself the chance of making your one and only life in this body worth something more. It’s possible that’s too much or even not enough but he figured there had to be a reason he thought of her in a way he did for no one else before. The questioning of his worth crippled him in ways and desperately he sought a sign that he was on the right track as much as he thought he was. The stars seemed to agree with his heart but only the stars in her eyes and the feeling in her heart would be the ultimate variables. Right now he’d have to make do with dampened footsteps and the faint buzzing of a dimmed light to read his words. Frankly, he wasn’t even satisfied with his own words tonight.

World of you

My wish for you is only what you’ve done for me
To clear the impure thoughts from mind
Wipe clean memories of insecurity
Silence words of haunting voices for good
Watch as it all melts into droplets crystal clear
Dissipating as they spiral away
Believe me now that this is my one intention
To love you in a way you’ve never known

I’d build a perfect world made all from parts of you
The air filled with particles of your presence
Earth composed of the minerals in your blood
Water crisp and fresh, rippling smooth like your hair
Wind blows carrying wishes of your lashes
I’d catch each one of them and only hope
One day you’ll know me the way I really am
While I peer in puddles bright blue to see my way

Doubt appears only in the darkest places
Ours shall never be anything but bright
Even dimly lit will not do as the chance remains
You may not see what’s true without the sun
Never think twice that it shines on you
With the fire in your soul, I made it so
Though you may believe I see you differently
I’ve drawn up this world of you long ago

In my schematics we stand together
Witnessing everything I love around us
Enveloping us in morning dew
Made of long lost tears we saved
Our world would be perfect in its faults
But not one fault made of any parts of your skin
As every bit remains perfect to my eyes
Designed just as my daydreams showed

On days, and only for a moment, it may be so
My words to you will struggle in their clarity
Hold these times against me, if you must
For as long as I’d hold your body against mine
Just remember that my world is clearer than my voice
You are the materials I longed to discover
Any thought different is simply untrue
See this place for what it is; what I want to love forever

Before we met, the curves of our world were just so
Every contour of yours delicately drawn at scale
Some of those tears saved will be yours but also mine
For you don’t believe I’d imagine it as it is
No matter what your perceptions of my arrangement
Never will I cease to show you the beauty of the hills
Or the pleasantry of the valleys brushed with green
They were conceived from you after all

Our world will exist as our love will too, if you let it
Some days it will rain, and maybe it will for weeks
Others, the heat will seep through to our bones
Each passing moment different than the next
Regardless, I’d like you to remember my words today
Not yesterday, but what spills from my head right now
I’d change nothing of the trees short or tall
Of the oceans vast or the rivers small

There’s a reason I’d design this world of you
One day, our bodies long gone, it will remain
Turned to dust beneath the ground
Maybe drifting in the water or the air
But never would I allow our souls to return
To a place which was not made of the best parts I’ve seen
And I do this all for them so that they can experience
The moments I fell in love with you over and over again

The last time I died

I’ve made it to today
Left behind my yesterday
But I think about the past
The scars leave me with memories
Remember when I died?
Not physically but mentally
My patience always tried
But all of you just left me here

I wither in the wind
Tossed around like leaves in fall
Our love, it does begin
Glad it brings no pain at all
Because I’m about to break
For goodness’ sake I will debate
Our lives are nothing more than fate
And there’s so much to appreciate

Now I’m looking in your eyes
You’ve helped erase years I despise
It’s like I’m in disguise
Each day with you is a surprise
Each time I sigh it’s because you smile
Each breath I take, it’s been a while
Each time my hands brush across your skin
Each glance we trade, I forget my sins

I want to forget days we didn’t share
Because nobody has really cared
Despite the fact you weren’t there
I always tried to keep my hope
Dreams would show me you were close
A distant view of what I need most
Kept dear to heart memories to come
Your eyes burned into eternity

To understand just what I think
Would be a task that’s out of grasp
My mind complex like nothing else
Lack of control brinks me to the brink
I died last time, and I’ll die again
Because everything is meant to end
But until that time, my love I’ll send
As I watch you turn into a lover and a friend

These words are nothing but a myth
As pessimism is what I think with
I can’t accept joy just as a gift
All good things seem to diminish
Maybe it’s because I’ve never tried
Or maybe it’s because my heart has died
So even though my emotions fade
You, my love, I’d never trade

In time I will repair the wounds
That time has opened while I live
Weathered body, mind and soul
I hope this time I stay alive
Because I’ve waited forever for you to arrive
Maybe I need you in order to revive
My life I’m struggling to survive.

Breezeblock

I am the wind that travels through the empty corridors of your heart, toppling over abandoned manuscripts half-written by those who parted ways with it long ago.  The dust having settled for years, continuously compounded, has congealed leaving a thick barrier around purity and innocence which is not easily blown away by the gusts of fresh air.  Each step through the murky halls leaves more prints that you can only hope will remain identifiable for years to come but the buildup within your fragile structure has seen these shoes before.  Rooms are locked with keys broken off within, door jams sealed tight with boxes trapped inside.  If you were to open those doors, my squalls would see such pain and tragedy contained in each square crate but wind itself is not deterred by goodness’ sake or evil’s fate.  Watch as I filter each passageway, meant not for yesterday but right now as I clear the way left impeded by those who disavow.  After each storm, gales do come to clear the debris and, as sure as the world turns, a luminous sight appears to burn away the memory of what’s lost and brightens the road for what’s to follow.  I am the wind, you are the heart, and the tempest has concluded bringing way for new beginnings to trust in and believe like the cool breeze of this winter’s day.

Temporary blindness

Sometimes the light turns on suddenly and you’re not ready, eyes adjusting slowly while you try to bring your surroundings into focus.  For a few minutes you’re not sure where you are and often that can last longer than you’d want.  Tentatively, you use the walls as your guidance but that doesn’t always keep you from bumping into corners.  True love, you turned on the light for me unexpectedly and maybe I wasn’t ready for the world of brightness that would ensue but having been in the dark for so long I don’t want to go back.  Illumination, I didn’t think I deserved you and it’s hard to believe you can exist in my life.  Peace, you are within my grasp and though I don’t pay mind to you in the ways you always deserve, I know now that you’re meant to be here. Light, please don’t grow tired of my temporary blindness… just give me time to wipe the sleep from my eyes.

Souls apart

As if the world was opening up in front of me, every breath I take of the air you breathe brings me closer to falling into you.  I endure your radiation, feel your heartbeat against my chest and taste your flavour at the tip of my tongue yet just far enough away to keep me coming back.  Through a layer only so thick, I enjoy your warmth and it’s everything I can do to stop from taking you for myself at every second.  The soft words in my ear, the sounds of an angel’s pitch whenever I press against or touch you just close enough, the way you purse your lips while saying words I can’t understand but am desperate to hear for eternity; all make it more difficult for me to resist moving beyond tracing hearts on your thigh and writing words with our lips together.  Your dulcitude no doubt goes deeper than the candied aroma of your skin and with each passing day I get closer to boring a hole in your soul to bury mine deep within so the two can become familiar once more.  Stay with me.. be mine, not as my possession but as my extension to which I’ll pay careful attention and will never leave vanquished again. ❤